A Testimony

Part of my evangelism final is giving my testimony in five different places/ways.  I’m a procrastinator by nature, and find myself needing this done six hours ago (Mom-I know this is a problem that I need to work on. No need to remind me … but I made sure my room was clean before I left this morning!… progress in some areas is good).  Moving on.

I thought it would be neat (and convenient) to post it on my blog. But I need to get some feedback from people, mainly so I can turn this in There will be three questions following my testimony… I would love for you to comment!!

Here we go… (I apologize, I can’t seem to get rid of the silly text below.)

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I’ve always struggled with thinking I didn’t have much of a testimony. Growing up as a pastor’s kid means being at the church whenever the doors are unlocked. I can’t tell you how many heart wrenching life testimonies I’ve heard. It’s always wonderful to hear of God’s amazing grace and love – but what about me? I was a good kid – a ‘model PK’, if you will. Would people ever be touched by my story? Did I even have one?

I’ve always been fascinated by missions. I suppose I’ve inherited that from my parents. They were always taking their youth group on a mission’s trip, or helping out a missionary somewhere in the world. But I got my first missions ‘bite’ when I was 14 years old. I discovered child sponsorship and decided that it was my responsibility to take on a child. So I found a little girl in Thailand who shared my birthday! Little did I know that by sponsoring Janjira, I was opening my heart to much bigger things! Three years later I found myself on an airplane destined for that very same country.

God definitely knew what He was doing in leading me to Asia. It’s not like this comes as a big surprise. I’d been told from birth that God knows more about me than everyone – even I. I guess it just hits home when it becomes vividly clear to your own eyes. God knew that by the end of those two weeks, my heart would ache for Thailand and the surrounding Asian countries. He knew the things I would be exposed to – the things that would pierce my soul. Things that would make me grateful for my own safe upbringing, but at the same time make me want to dig in my heels so I could stay and help.

You see, my eyes were opened to the horridness of the world we live in. I discovered for myself the things the media hides. And I wanted to make a difference! Unfortunately, I didn’t keep fanning that fire, and it slowly withered away… but it didn’t quite die. I didn’t become a ‘bad’ person, I just wasn’t doing everything right.

Over many seasons of growth and backsliding I found myself at a crossroads. I could either keep on living my apathetic life, or I could finally accept the call God had placed on my life and jump back on the path he had laid for me. I was in such a place of loneliness and very stagnant in my spiritual life that I was growing increasingly frustrated with myself. Inside, I wanted to please God and trust in Him, but I struggled with my fleshly pride – I didn’t want to give up.

My turning point happened around 2am one morning. I woke up in a start, and knew something was wrong. I got out of bed, and (oddly for myself) grabbed my Bible. I started reading from Haggai. This has never been a book that I’ve felt a particular connection with – I don’t think I’ve even heard a sermon preached from it. But I opened to it nonetheless. Something struck me – I had my first God-moment in a very long while. This short book speaks of God’s longing for the temple to be rebuilt, but no one is willing. Verse 6 says “… you eat but are not satisfied. You drink but are still thirsty…” That was exactly how I felt. But I really lost it when I got to verse 12. There were a few young people who took initiative to rebuild the temple. They were unaffected by everyone around them. Their sole purpose was to please God. Verse 13 says this, “Then Haggai, the LORD’s messenger, gave the people this message from the LORD. “I am with you, says the LORD!””

So there I was, 20 years old, laying facedown on the carpet in my room, crying my eyes out. God kept calling me to a purpose, but I was ignoring Him. I was doing my own thing – following my own agenda. But I knew something was missing. I was not satisfied with where I was. I wanted to feel God’s presence again in my life. I wanted to hear Him say “I am with you!” I longed to know that His favor was on my life. In order for that to happen, I knew I needed to release control and relinquish my rights.

After a series of many “God things”, I found myself living by faith every day. I moved back over the state not even knowing where I would be living. As I neared my destination, I received the blessing of a free place to live. I started the school not knowing how I would come up with payments. With all past payments combined, I’ve paid, with my own money, less than 25% of tuition. God has blessed me time and time again in every aspect of my life.

I continue to wonder why He would want me – but I’m willing to accept the challenge. Every day I’m a work in progress, but the important thing is I’m growing. I’m getting closer to my savior, and he continues to lead me. Every day I’m comforted by one of my favorite verses. “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you” Isaiah 26:3

So here’s your part -

What did you like best about the student’s presentation?

How could the student improve in the way she participated (please don’t say something about time management!)

What other words of encouragement do you have for the student?

Thanks to you!

~ by lifeofwonder on December 11, 2008.